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A divorce is one of the most traumatic events in a person's life,
ranking right up there with the death of a loved one. A divorce is
also one of the few times – and maybe the only time – a person has
to deal with the court system. Ending a disintegrating marriage is
made more difficult by the complexity of the divorce process and the
emotional stress of dealing with the issues of child custody,
support, and division of assets. Understanding the legal process is
as baffling as trying to understand complex medical procedures, and
just as you need to trust your physician, you need to feel confident
with your attorney. Your divorce attorney must be a combination of
therapist, confidant, clergy person and “legal eagle.” So, how do
you find this person to whom you can entrust your future?
Get Referrals from Friends
If you have friends who have gone through divorce, ask what they
liked and disliked about their attorneys. Was your friend’s case as
complex or less complex than your own? Was the attorney equally
competent in handling emotional issues such as custody and
“business” issues such as division of assets? Also ask about the
attorney who represented your friend’s spouse. Meet with several
attorneys. Schedule appointments with several attorneys for
consultations, and let the attorney know you are in the interviewing
process. Most attorneys won’t see you free of charge, since they
have only their time and advice to sell, but some offer discounts
for the initial consultation.
Ask the Right Questions
When you meet with an attorney, bring a list of questions
regarding your concerns in choosing an attorney as well as your
personal concerns in the divorce case. Ask how the law firm bills
its clients and ascertain the billing rates for each person who will
be working on your case. Most attorneys charge for all time spent in
working on your matter. This includes time for phone calls, drafting
court documents, court preparation, and travel to the courthouse. Be
sure your attorney or someone in the office will return phone calls
within a reasonable time and that you will receive copies of all
pleadings and correspondence received and generated. It will be
difficult for any attorney to give you an accurate estimate of total
costs for the divorce because there are so many variables. Does your
spouse want to reach a speedy resolution of the issues or is your
spouse going to litigate every issue? No attorney will know all of
the issues at the initial consultation. Beware of any attorney who
guarantees certain results. An attorney can only promise to use his
or her best efforts in representing you.
Develop Lines of Communication
Above all, you and your attorney should be able to communicate
effectively. Your attorney can only give you your choice of options
and advise you as to the probable outcome of each option. But
remember, nothing is a “slam dunk.” As in the rest of life, the
legal process does not issue any guarantees.
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